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| Source:wearewhatfeministslooklike.tumblr.com |
One thing I know for certain is that you cannot please everyone; even more true in this age of social media. Attack is the modus operandi of bloggers, pundits, Facebookers, and even those who were once on your side. If you know me well you can vouch for my veracity; when I spout off about something it is not idle conversation. I have a conviction, an objection, a cause that nine times out of ten is based on personal experience. I don’t select areas for protest that I know little about, I stick within my realm of knowledge and my well-rounded nomadic life has provided me with an abundance of enlightenment.
I advocate for victims of domestic violence because I am a survivor. As a former multi-gun owner who has pointed a gun at another human being in self-defense, I disapprove of the NRA and support stricter gun laws, undoubtedly my least popular soapbox because Americans do love their guns. I protest the destruction of the rainforest because I’ve been there, love it, and understand the critical role it plays in the survival of our planet. Along this same environmental vein, I oppose The Serengeti Highway because I detest corporate rapists who do not respect our world which includes all wildlife. I thank all the valiant warriors who fight for Unci Maka and our water; on this issue I am on the sidelines admiring your bravery and cheering for you. Currently, I am a caregiver for my mother and father who have dementia and Alzheimer’s and the treatment of these incurable insidious diseases will no doubt be what I will take issue with next. I am too mired in its devastation right now to be of any use.
The first cause I ever became involved with was women's rights in the early 1980s. I had recently escaped an abusive relationship, entered college, gave birth to a son ten months after studying for the final 101 Biology exam with my lab partner who—surprise—was the baby daddy. We married five months after our son was born.
At the University of Wyoming, I was a volunteer for the Women’s Studies Department, fortunate to be involved in the tail-end of what was known as “second wave” feminism. I planned meetings, typed up agendas, made signs, researched, and recruited other volunteers to further this cause. Second wave feminists focused on the workplace, equal pay, reproductive rights, and domestic violence issues. The feminists were responsible for the nationwide establishment of rape crisis centers and battered women's shelters. They were instrumental in changing custody and divorce law. This era celebrated the first annual Domestic Violence Awareness Week and held the first National Women of Color conference.
The 1980s feminists wanted to believe that equal pay for equal work would be common by 1990. It wasn’t, and in 2015, it still isn’t. And that’s all Patricia Arquette was trying to say in her brief speech during the Academy Awards. I knew exactly what she meant. I didn’t dissect her words looking for fault, misconstrue her good intent, or attack her on twitter, in fact, I thanked her on twitter. I understand she was speaking for all women. She wasn’t maliciously singling out women who never had children, or excluding women of color or lesbians. She wasn't saying that minority groups owed her anything, she was asking for these groups to join her in her fight. Does it matter that she is paid more money per movie than most women will make in a lifetime? I don’t think so. She works in an industry that pays well, but pays women less than men across the board. I could never be an actress and do what she does. I can’t even speak comfortably in front of a small group of people. She had just won an Oscar and instead of making that moment all about her (which it was) she chose to speak up for a cause that she believes in. "It's our time to have wage equality once and for all and equal rights for women."
At the University of Wyoming, I was a volunteer for the Women’s Studies Department, fortunate to be involved in the tail-end of what was known as “second wave” feminism. I planned meetings, typed up agendas, made signs, researched, and recruited other volunteers to further this cause. Second wave feminists focused on the workplace, equal pay, reproductive rights, and domestic violence issues. The feminists were responsible for the nationwide establishment of rape crisis centers and battered women's shelters. They were instrumental in changing custody and divorce law. This era celebrated the first annual Domestic Violence Awareness Week and held the first National Women of Color conference.
The 1980s feminists wanted to believe that equal pay for equal work would be common by 1990. It wasn’t, and in 2015, it still isn’t. And that’s all Patricia Arquette was trying to say in her brief speech during the Academy Awards. I knew exactly what she meant. I didn’t dissect her words looking for fault, misconstrue her good intent, or attack her on twitter, in fact, I thanked her on twitter. I understand she was speaking for all women. She wasn’t maliciously singling out women who never had children, or excluding women of color or lesbians. She wasn't saying that minority groups owed her anything, she was asking for these groups to join her in her fight. Does it matter that she is paid more money per movie than most women will make in a lifetime? I don’t think so. She works in an industry that pays well, but pays women less than men across the board. I could never be an actress and do what she does. I can’t even speak comfortably in front of a small group of people. She had just won an Oscar and instead of making that moment all about her (which it was) she chose to speak up for a cause that she believes in. "It's our time to have wage equality once and for all and equal rights for women."
I was sadly surprised by the backlash from other women. Elizabeth Stoker Bruenig's blog in the New Republic was particularly scathing, and I think, completely off the mark. I often lament that young women today take so much for granted. They are scarcely aware of the blood, sweat, and tears shed by the women who fought for decades so women today can get that promotion, file their restraining order, enjoy corporate paid daycare, and participate in sports. Arquette’s simple speech was about all of that. It was about realizing that gender inequality still exists.
And I got it.
And I got it.
