My Father's Shoulders

1956

 In America, we set aside the third Sunday in June to honor our paternal clan members. Although the statistics are hard to come by because the US Census Bureau has not gathered data on divorce or remarriage since 1990, it is assumed that there are now nearly as many stepfamilies as there are biological families. A quick look around at a family gathering will often confirm how prevalent blended families are in today's society. In 2011, it is not uncommon for a man to be both a father and a stepfather, but it wasn't the norm back in the 1950s when my mother, a divorced woman with three children, married my dad.

He adopted my older sister, brother, and me two years after their marriage; four biological children followed, and we were raised as one family. Father provided food, shelter, clothing, wisdom, and comfort throughout our childhood and this continued into our adult years if the need arose.  I have never looked upon my father as a stepparent—he is the only father I have ever known. Some biological fathers do not accept their child-rearing responsibilities or acknowledge their own children and a child is fortunate when a stepfather assumes the role. Often, it is not the bloodline, but the decency, integrity, and trustworthiness of the adoptive parent or stepparent that forms and solidifies a lifelong bond with the child.

Although, our family has had many challenges—family dynamics are difficult even for flesh and blood kin—we all recognize and honor one father; the stoic man who worked for the federal government for twenty-eight years to provide for and care for his family. We are blessed that he is still with us and I am grateful to be going to my sister's house today to celebrate his contribution to our lives.

Happy Father's Day, Daddy. I love you.